Dying to Self

It’s been a while since I’ve written. There’s been a lot going on and every time I get an opportunity to sit and write something I find myself overwhelmed by even the look of a computer. Even now I’m struggling as it’s smoking hot and the heat radiating from this computer is causing further discomfort in my body.

Let’s start with Canadian thanksgiving. I think this was the best so far. This is the third year in a row I’ve celebrated thanksgiving in Africa. We always organize a BIG function where the Canadians are responsible for providing the essentials and everyone else just brings a side dish. This year I made 66 mini and 1 big pumpkin (carrot) pies. They were just as superb as last year. We bought 3 turkeys and 3 chickens and I’m not sure how we managed, but we cooked them to perfection! I was so impressed and truly felt like I fulfilled my female existence by mastering 3 turkeys and 67 pies. As much as I hate to admit it, it’s very true. Jayme the Babooshka of course once again led the perogie assembly line. We really outdid ourselves this time. It’s really strange, though, to think of my last thanksgiving in Canada being in 2007. That seems like ages ago. Has it really been that long that I’ve been coming to this place? Unreal.

Our turkey celebration also marked the last night with my dear friends Brooke and Jed. I miss them every day. They’ve been here since September 2007 so have been central to my time here. I’ll save myself from tears and keep it short. But I must just say that they’re my favourite.

Since Brooke has left, though, the pressure has definitely increased. My first month here I could easily hide behind Brooke, but once she left I actually had to start doing some real work. As much as it’s been hectic trying to manage and organize the South Africa/Swaziland Regional Support Team, it’s been really awesome. I’m working closely with Levy (a key member of the Hands family usually sent out to break new ground all across Africa) and just love serving the people around me. I’ve been getting out to the communities often and spending two days a week in the Service Centres (last year I worked in the Bushbuckridge Service Centre). We’ve been quite busy organizing trainings for care workers. The trainings are to communicate the changing face of HIV/Aids and the need to fight it by providing holistic care for orphans through parental home visits. We’re rolling this training out into all the communities in South Africa and so far have completed 7 out of 14. Not bad. But these trainings really mark a new season for us. We’re really seeing the need to walk closely with these care workers, to be constantly encouraging and influencing them. It’s quite exciting to see how our Service Centres will figure out how to mentor them on an ongoing basis.

On a REALLY exciting note ... my father is coming to visit in January! Eeeeeep! I can hardly believe it myself and when I tell people, I just giggle. It’s so exciting and so crazy. He’s coming Jan 15-28. I’m hoping to find him some building projects. Simon figures there will be child home renovations in Bushbuckridge that’ll need a hand or two, so I’m sure we can find something for him to do. Not to mention we’ll go on a safari and, really, how can my hunting-lover father come to Africa and not get the opportunity to shoot something exotic? He just came out of elk season (with a nice one I hear) and is moving into moose season. So I guess I’ll have to get him some gun-time here too.

Eish, this one’s long. Sorry, guys. Another exciting thing happening lately is I’ve joined our worship team at church. This has been something I’ve wanted to do my whole life. A couple Sundays ago I actually sang and played guitar. It’s hard to believe people actually trust me with a microphone, but it was so much fun. I’m sure I could do it without ceasing. That and eating cereal. I had three bowls of cornflakes for supper. As it gets hotter here, my craving for a delicious bowl of cereal intensifies. OMMnomnom.

I know this is long, but I can’t finish this entry without talking about Lorraine, Clearance [Clarence], and Remember. I write [Clarence] because that’s his name but this weekend I saw him writing it “Clearance”. These three have been a family close to my heart for a long time, ever since Louise stayed with them and introduced me. I’m sure I’ve talked about them before somewhere but Lorraine is 16, Remember 11 and Clearance 10. Their father passed away in 2007, their mother in 2008 and they’ve been staying alone since. While in Canada, they were the story I seemed to always share and as soon as I got back to Africa I felt desperate to see them. And this urgency to see them wasn’t for nothing. As soon as I saw them a couple weeks ago, it absolutely destroyed me. Their situation is not good and as much as I wish to share the details with you all, I really can’t. But as soon as I saw them I felt the urgency to stay with them and spend time with them. A week later (this past weekend), I stayed in their community (not with them, unfortunately, as they have no windows or doors on their house and Minah deemed it too dangerous for me... but for some reason not for them). I got to hang out with Clearance on Friday night and play a lot of Top 10 (card game very commonly played here in South Africa). On Saturday I spent the entire day sitting in their house. Lorraine made me cook, Clearance and I read storybooks as Lorraine did my hair, we all made friendship bracelets, played more Top 10, and drew pictures of houses. It was such a lovely time, although my derriere became quite sore from sitting for 8 hours on a cement floor. And then on Sunday I sat beside Clearance during the 3-hour church service and tried to pay attention to the screaming preacher while Clearance played with my hand, stroked my skin, and drew pictures of elephants, lions, snakes, and buffalo in my journal. They’re such lovely kids, but were dealt a bad hand in life. It’s quite hard to imagine that this type of situation can actually be real. Where is everyone? How is this allowed? A young girl left to care for younger siblings, even struggling to care for herself as she engages in destructive and degrading activities. A young boy awfully sick, going blind in one eye, and often left alone in the house as the older sister runs around. And then the middle boy who was taken into the home of a teacher in a different community because he had compassion on him, but what’s left is a broken up family that only has each other and desperately needs one another. But God isn’t concerned about what the world is doing for them, He’s asking me what I’m doing about it. A friendship bracelet is a start, but it signifies much more to me than a string on a wrist. I’m committed to them.

Dying to self. We become a little less significant when God shows his little snotty-nosed face.

Bhuti Vusi

The other day I was walking through the community with some volunteers. Now this isn’t a regular activity I get to participate in, but I was hosting another team of missionary students. We had to get through a wire fence so one of the care workers lifted one of the wires so I could bend down and get through. As I bent down and my upper body paralleled the ground, I saw a Cobra quickly pass directly under me. And in this position I froze. The care workers squealed a little bit, but mostly laughed at my frozen response. I survived a Cobra.

On a sad note, Vusi passed away. Now if you haven’t been keeping up with my blogs, please refer to Drowning in a Sea of Yellow. The care workers said Vusi had passed away the night we prayed for him. It’s interesting how similar this situation is to one that burned me deep: Gloria. The circumstances were very similar. The only difference is how we responded to the need. When I met Gloria, I sensed God wanted to just give her peace and rest and so I sat and held her hand for a very long time and then prayed for peace and rest. She died that night. When I first walked into Vusi’s room, I sensed the end of his life nearing. In that moment, I felt strongly to sit on his bedside and hold his hand and tell him he’s beautiful and God loves him and God sees him even within his pain. But I just sat back as a group of people prayed intensely for healing. It’s hard to not feel like I failed him in that moment. God clearly had a purpose for Vusi then. Perhaps God wanted him to die with dignity while being loved. We, as stupid Christians, completely misinterpreted God’s will in that moment and, in our emotion-filled initiative to manifest God’s power, as his son and wife watched us, we prayed and thanked God for healing.

The Mess of African Politics.

Here is some interesting reading for those who love the mess of politics.

George just got back from Goma, DRC. Eish, that place is
unbelievable. Not sure if you've been following what's been
happening. They officially declared the war there over and to
celebrate their 50th anniversary of independence they closed down all
the refugee camps. It was so heavy on my heart the whole time he was away. I couldn't stop thinking about it and praying for it. It just feels so big to me.
That place is so broken and so dark.. it just weighs so heavy on me.
Read about it on the Hands website and be sure to click on the link at the bottom of the Hands page to read more about it on New York Times:
http://www.handsatwork.org/newsroom/2010/9/2/in-a-war-ravaged-region-drc.html

South Africa is also a disaster. The whole country has been on strike
for... well since I've been here anyway. Hospitals are calling family
members to tell them to fetch the patients (even ones in critical
condition), students have been out of school (and as a teacher you can
understand my frustration because before World Cup, they went on
strike for a week, and then they were let out for 6 weeks during
World Cup, and now they've been on strike for over a month), and
passionate people who don't want to see their own suffer are being
seriously threatened. ANyway, if you're interested you should read
about it: http://www.nytimes.com/2010/09/07/world/africa/07safrica.html?_r=1

On a different note I forgot to mention in the earlier blog, I went to a real soccer game with Todd and Katie. South Africa vs. Niger. It was fun. The Vuvuzelas were absolutely obnoxious. But I randomly found ear plugs in my bag which was a huge lifesaver. Those things will drive someone mad, literally.

Anyway, read up!

Drowning in a Sea of Yellow

Firstly, I just have to say that today I met the president of South Africa, Jacob Zuma. I was in Clau Clau hosting a group of missions students who were interested in doing an outreach with Hands. We went into the community expecting to do home visits and found ourselves drowning in a sea of yellow (yellow Zuma shirts that is). Zuma was coming to visit. Since everyone in the community was there, there was no point of doing home visits. We sat and waited for Zuma. Three hours later, Zuma showed up. He stood on the stage and began his speech. Five minutes into his speech, he noticed the 3 of us white people in the crowd and asked us if we understood. We told him we didn't and he arranged for someone to sit with us and interpret. When the lady sat with us, he told her to summarize so as she summarized, everyone waited and stared at us (including Mr. President). After she finished, I gave Zuma a thumbs up and shouted "Siyabonga (thank you)". Everyone in the crowd laughed (including Mr. President). The above picture is me wearing one of the shirts.

After seeing Zuma, we squeezed in two home visits. The first one was the home of a young man and his young wife. This man, Vusi, had been sick for 7 months and is clearly in his last leg of life... couldn't talk, could barely move... We went in and prayed for him.. the missionary students took the lead and there were tongues being spoken and Jesus' name screamed and crying for healing... and my whole body was full of goosebumps and tears were welling in my eyes. I'm not sure if it's because it was powerful, or if there was pain in my spirit. I didn't feel very comfortable with the situation. I just couldn't imagine how praying for healing would be appropriate. I wanted everyone to leave and I just wanted to sit on his bedside and hold his hand and tell him how beautiful he is and how Jesus loves him and sees him and that he need not fear what is to come. And I wanted to do the same for his wife.

Basically my days now have been filled with the new volunteers that came a week ago. I'm helping out quite a bit with orientation, but will get extremely busy soon as most of the volunteers will start being placed short term in South Africa to get their feet wet. My role is basically to oversee their involvement and mentor and teach them as they go along, equipping them with the knowledge and skills they'll need to be effective in the community. It's really quite neat and I'm excited about it. It's very much up my alley. This year is going to be a good year, I can just sense it. God is already challenging me big time and teaching me a lot. He's really calling me to step up and set a higher standard for myself.

Anyway, love you all! Please e-mail or text or call me.

KD

Surprise, child! There's a White Lady in your bed!

Ughhh facebook really does not function well here and so I feel I am slowly being weaned off of a drug that I allowed 8 months of fast internet to enslave me. Sometimes all I want to do is put a little status like this:

“Went to church at 6pm Friday night not expecting the service to go until 6am and be put to bed at 1:30am on the floor of the Pastor's home with all the other small children while the adults continued to praise Jesus”

True story. What a crazy night. These Africans know how to party Jesus-style. I must admit, most of it made me feel uncomfortable. Yes there were beautiful moments and powerful moments, but for the most part I felt uncomfortable. This could be a result of Christian culture in North America where we are scared to pray aloud but some of it is also sometimes the type of gospel that is preached and focused on. But I sang and dance and slept well beside a little 4 year-old guy.

The reason I went was to watch one of my previous students, Nokuzola, preach. She has recently received a calling on her life to be a pastor. She was fantastic! Most preachers scream and yell and the congregation cheers and shouts "Amen" even though no logical points are made, but Zola stood up there and taught. She was gentle but strong and connected points well and really knew her stuff. Before she started to preach, she sang a worship song and it was beautiful. I teared up and felt so proud of the woman of God that stood before me.

This week I'm excited. I'm going to Oshoek with a group of fellow Hands people for three days to put on a Church Leaders Workshop. Oshoek is right on the Swaziland border and I hear it's stunning! It's really quite a privilege to be a part of challenging and encouraging pastors to care for orphans and widows. It's also a challenge, because these people know much more about the Bible than I do, so it's more of facilitating discussion on what's happening around the community and the church's role in it than actually training or teaching. These pastors have the solutions, it's just a matter of encouraging them to come up with them and supporting them along the way.

Ever have the feeling like you're being watched? As I write this, there is a monkey hanging on the bars outside the window 2 metres away from me, staring at me.

Red Soil and Black Faces

Well, I guess the first post is to communicate or display that indeed I have arrived alive. Other than that, I’m not sure what to say. I haven’t really been up to much since I’ve been here and one would think that despite not doing anything, there must be tons to say about being in South Africa, but it’s all so familiar to me that it hardly seems like anything significant to write about. But I’ll try.

My flights were good. They seemed short. As soon as I got on the plane I ordered the usual red wine (a missionary’s traveling secret), drank it up, and fell asleep instantly. Helen and Paul gave me sleeping pills that I thought I would try out, so did on the second leg of the journey, but besides the fact that they tasted absolutely awful, I’m pretty sure they did nothing. After quickly arriving in Johannesburg, I waited patiently for 10 hours for Shelly to join me. And join me did she ever! As soon as she came through the doors and saw me, she hopped around, literally, with excitement. Our adventure begins. We drove mostly in the dark to get to the Hands Village in time for George’s birthday party. As soon as we pulled up, my legs were shaking violently. I was excited to see everyone, but for some reason I was terribly nervous.

But it’s been great to reunite with my African family. It honestly doesn’t even feel like I left. The wonderful 8 months I spent at home feels like a breath. There have been changes, as Hands is always changing, but I feel as if I’m slipping right back into where I left off. Sort of. My role here is up for discussion. I’m actually supposed to be meeting with Lynn and Levy today to discuss where I can put my hands. I’ll be staying in South Africa, probably getting involved in similar stuff I was doing before (supporting communities as they strive to care effectively for orphans, widows, and people dying of HIV/Aids) but there is talk of dipping my hands into some new things. Maybe some international team (marketing and advocating), maybe some volunteer stuff (helping to place new volunteers that come in and equipping them for service). It’s all quite exciting.

I had the opportunity already to visit Sesinyana, Nokuzola, and Patricia. All of them are doing very well. Sesinyana and baby Prosperity are looking great! Prosperity even said “Gogo” while I was there, which means Granny. Sesinyana has been working as a server at the country club in White River, which is great. She gets bored easy and loves to be around people. Patricia finished her Social Auxiliary Work program and has been working with Masoyi Home Based Care helping to run the program Winrock, which educates young orphan girls on HIV/Aids and supports them through school, often helping them with school supplies and uniforms. Nokuzola also finished her Social Auxiliary Work program and has recently received a calling on her life to be a pastor. She’s so excited but terrified. It’s so fun to see her talk about it. When she first heard this calling, she responded the same way many of us do when we don’t necessarily want to do what God tells us, “God, WHY are you doing this!?!?” She preaches this weekend at her church so I’m definitely looking forward to seeing her in action.

I’m not exactly sure what the next couple weeks will look like, but I’m sure I’ll get busy very soon. I’m planning next weekend to drive up to Venda to visit the other students in University. I’m also very, very much looking forward to welcoming Todd and Katie here and re-welcoming Morgan!! I can’t even bear it I’m so excited!!!

As much as there are exciting things happening around me, I do miss home terribly
already. I had such a great time at home and this next stint here in Africa will be more difficult than the first. I’m really looking forward to this next while to really develop my gifts and grow in new ways. I’m surrounded by such a beautiful and authentic community of believers and led by such passionate men and women of God. It’s good to be back and contribute to the big things God is doing here.

Please pray that I can get settled in, find the role that I will find most joy in and can be most effective, and also that I can continue to communicate well and journey with my friends and family back home.

Much love to you all!

Kristal

PS – Shelly, you’ll be happy to know the monkeys stole ALL my bananas and made a horrid mess of the kitchen!

ALSO!
Here is my contact information. Feel free to send me letters, e-mails, text messages, or even phone. It is free to receive calls internationally and text messages. Also feel free to give out my blog: www.kristalgadsby.com to anyone you think would be interested in following.

Kristal Gadsby
c/o Hands at Work in Africa
PO Box 3534
White River, South Africa
1240

kristalgadsby@gmail.com OR kristal@handsatwork.org [goes to the same place]

My number is +27 72 183 8626. To call from Canada, dial 011 27 72 183 8626

Final Canada Tour Dates!

Hey everyone,
My time in Canada is quickly coming to an end. I'm going to be making a final tour to cover the main areas. I want to see you so please contact me and we'll try to get together before I head back to Afreeka. This is a tentative schedule for my last weeks:

July 18 - 20 -- Lloydmonster
July 20 - 24 -- Saskatoon
July 24 - 28 -- Calgary
July 29 - 30 -- Lloydmonster
July 30 - 02 -- Goodsoil (Family Reunion)
Aug 2 - 5 -- Calgary
Aug 5 - 7 -- Sky Abyss
Aug 7 - South Africa

Much Love.