Getting lost.

As I sit on a reed mat, drinking my Ricoffy and watching the sun go down just past the grass fence, I can hear in the distance the rhythms of traditional drums mourning the loss of a village chief. In what I wish was far in the distance, I can hear a young goat "mbuzi" hollering for her mother in a way that could easily be a YouTube hit. My sister, Annie, is around the corner, beating a bag full of maize with a stick in an attempt to sheer the recent abundant harvest. My friend Priscilla is inside bathing her two younger brothers while my mother is busy in the cook hut, smoke billowing out the glassless windows. I sit here reading a book with lines like: "The most likely to befriend strangers are those who have been strangers themselves. The best way to grow empathy for those who are lost is to know what it means to be lost yourself." I feel so grateful for the many moments I have felt lost on this continent, whether in culture, in language, on dark Zambian roads, in emotional immaturity, in identity, in heartbreak, in search of Jesus. It is when we are lost that we are found.

Joy.

Winding through the dusty paths in Mulenga, crossing through plots, passing drunk men and hundreds of young children, we came to Joy's house. It is a small rented room connected to a number of other rooms where families stay. We entered the room with Beauty and Sylvie, two beautiful care workers in Mulenga. We sat on the floor and were instantly bombarded by a number of children. Inny, 3, sat on my lap while his twin, Vinny, began playing in Will's. On the walk to the house Beauty and Sylvie were trying to explain how all the children were related and what the situation was. We knew all their names before meeting them, so the first 5 minutes was trying to figure out who was who. Ruby, 17, is the head of the house, and has an 8 month old baby girl, Mary. Her sister (call her the Big Mother) is the mother of Lea (7), Inny (3) and Vinny (3). Big Mother also is taking care of Joy (5), her grandaughter. Joy's mother ran out on her a few years ago. We were told Big Mother is a drunkard and was recently fighting with the neighbours. The neighbours called the cops and she ran also, leaving Ruby to care for all the children.

So here was Will and I, sitting with 5 abandoned children, Joy twice. Sylvie sat next to Ruby, talking quietly to her. Inny fell asleep in my arms within minutes of rocking him. Vinny continued very busily playing in and out of Will's legs, grabbing different toys, including a dirty chunk of foam that he wiped all over Wills' face. Joy sat quietly on Beauty's lap, looking too serious for a 5 year old. Baby Mary joyfully and gleefully crawled around the floor and was passed from person to person. Will was asked to pray. Just as Will began praying, baby Mary explosively soiled herself and the floor. After Will prayed, we sat. Sylvie continued to speak softly to Ruby, who looked very tired. I sat and watched Joy. She is 5 but appears to be about 2. Her hair is reddish and very thin. She sat on Beauty's lap and began combing through her own hair with a pink velcro curler. When I thought of her and the boy sleeping on my lap, I wept. How many times does Inny get to feel the safety and security of being rocked in someone's arms? What has being abandoned and rejected twice done to little Joy? As I stared at this clearly malnourished diamond, for the first time in my life I desperately wanted to find a way to take her home.

It was time for the children to go to the feeding point to get their only meal each day. Lea was attending the community school so got herself bathed and ready. Joy, too, bathed herself to get ready for the feeding point. We carried the children on our backs the entire way. Joy got her meal first. I sat with her as she ate. Still feeling heavy in my heart and tearful, Reuben (the coordinator) arrived back from his home visits. As soon as Joy saw him, she completely lost her mind. She called out to him, “Pastor!” He ran to her and gave her a high-five. I lost it again. She has been rejected twice, but has been accepted and is deeply loved by Reuben, Beauty, Sylvie, and many other men and women of God in Mulenga. And I know Joy knows it. I can see it in her face when she sees Reuben. I can hear it in her voice when she calls out for him.

A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in his holy dwelling. God sets the lonely in families ... “Because of the oppression of the weak and the groaning of the needy, I will now arise,” says the Lord. “ I will protect them from those who malign them.”

And the words of the Lord are flawless, like silver refined in a furnace of clay; purified seven times.

Psalm 68:5-6; Psalm 12:5-6

 Joy and Kristal at the feeding point.

The Real Africa

Tuesday, June 11.

The ladies started off the day with prayer. A small group of us women who live at Kachele Village gathered in the middle of the yard, sitting on tree stumps in the sun. We shared our stories to one another and then continued praying for the things on our heart.

Shortly after, we jumped into a tinted-windowed mini-bus and headed to Kitwe to meet up with the Service Centre team. We were warmly welcomed by Blessings, Towela, Mary, Clement, and Esnart. This a power-house of a team. A power-house of the most gentle and sacrificial, yet anointed and authoritative people. They shared about their hearts, about the work in Mulenga, and a particular child in Mulenga that touches each of their hearts.

The mini-bus then took us into Mulenga, a slum-compound on the outskirts of Kitwe. I first visited this community in 2009. A few things are noticed immediately. First, the only road that enters into the community is one that was built by the care workers themselves. Secondly, children are everywhere. The majority of the population is children. Thirdly, drunk men and women wander around everywhere from early morning to late evening. The best part about visiting these communities is not the adorable children we get to play with and hold and love on (although a plus), but seeing anointed men and women of God playing with, loving, and truly delighting in the most vulnerable children in the community. These are children whose parents are drunkards and/or prostitutes and/or deathly sick or children completely without parents.

We then proceeded to Luanshya to sit at the feet of James and Sukai. I continue to use the word 'anointed' because there is no other way to describe all the people around us. When I first met them, I found myself to be in the presence of people that completely exude Christ. I found myself wanting to be with them all the time, to sit and listen to them. Today during tea with them, Lisa leaned over and whispered to me, “I just want to cry this whole time. I feel like I'm with Jesus.” We sat together, hearing the story of how they came to be involved with Hands, how God has touched and changed their lives, and about the Jesus that they know. James, especially, has a crazy testimony of how God viciously chased him down. After James shared a word with us, we prayed and sang together, then came home.

Julia has been really wanting to lead us in communion (something she has never led or been involved in organizing before). When we returned home, we had a beautiful time of breaking bread and praying together. It's been really amazing to see people become inspired to initiate or lead something along the way this trip. I was so proud of Julia tonight.

I lie in bed tonight with a grateful heart, completely filled. I don't deserve to be here, I don't deserve to be with these amazing leaders of Africa, to walk with them, and I don't deserve to be leading an amazing family of random individuals who love God desperately and have hearts so filled with compassion. So all I can do is sit here and be completely grateful, giving God the glory and thanking him for his goodness and choosing me to be a part of it.

-K

in Photos

We made it to South Africa. Some proof of the journey along the way:

Kachele Farm, Luanshya, Zambia. Our home during
Hands at Work African and International Celebrations.

Waiting for food. Celebrations.

Celebrating with our volunteers from all over Africa.

A South African braai in anticipation of a certain upcoming wedding.

Our Hands at Work family.

Wedding.

Proof Will has spent time in the community since we've been here.

Kristal loving life.

Siyaphila

Mulishani from Zambia!

We have arrived and we are ecstatic! Just a quick update to essentially say siyaphila (we are alive). Flights were long but that's how it goes. We arrived in Zambia yesterday afternoon to a farm full of family and friends from all over the world, but most especially all over Africa. That first day Willis got busy helping get things set up for our Celebrations and I sat around blubbering like a baby. It feels SO good to be here. We missed these people like crazy. What a gift to have been part of these lives and to continue to be part of it, despite being in Canada for the past two years.

It's a bit surreal. Yesterday I found myself going on an 8 km run with George and Levy on footpaths through tall grass in 33 degree weather. Eish. That was a bit much.

As I write this, Willis is with a crew of men fixing the road. Living the dream.

Not sure when we'll write again. I hope to not write too often. It becomes easy to experience things through a blogger's eyes as opposed to one's own. But, just wanted to say we are alive and we love you all.

K (+W)


To Shelly - Sukai just hugged me. Be jealous. She's got a cute little fro happening right now. She's the best.

Africa, siyabuya namuhla!

Staring out at the Poplars and mountains as I write this, it's hard to believe our view will soon turn to Acacias and mounds of red dirt. We leave today. We are THRILLED! I could hardly sleep this morning. I have found myself frolicking around the house, doing absurd and awkward movements with my body corresponding with absurd and awkward sounds with my mouth. This is what happens to me when I'm excited.

Just wanted to write this so people know we will try to blog about our journey.

We arrive in Ndola, Zambia on Sunday and are there for a week. Then we head down to our homeland in South Africa for a month as we prepare and wait for our lovely team members to arrive.

HUGE HUGE HUGE thanks to all who have supported us with words, prayers, and moneys all along the way. We are truly grateful. We love our community here and are so excited to come back and LIVE among you!

Lots of love to you all!

K (+W)

Home and At Home

After two years of departing my long-time home in Africa, Willis and I will be returning. For a short stint, I assure you. We have the gift of returning for 3 months, two of which we will be leading a group of 8 fine individuals from Canada, Germany, and Australia, to and through four wonderful countries: South Africa, Zambia, Zimbabwe and Malawi. I've met (mostly through skype) most of them and truly feel like it is a gift and an honour to be comrades with these folk, journeying together through bush and plain, urban and rural, heart ache and joy.

Home is something I've been thinking about lately. For years I have been dancing back and forth between the notion of my home being in Africa or my home being in Canada, but Willis and I feel truly blessed with a calm heart in terms of "home". We feel like we've finally entered into a time where we are no longer wandering. We are making our home in Calgary. God is lining up all kinds of great things: a house, a job I love, schooling Will feels excited about, beautiful community. It's happening. Our African Father, George, visited us one weekend a few months back and shared with us about the Israelites that wandered until finally they entered the promised land and ate fruit from their land. This feels like us right now. No longer are we on manna. We are eating from our land. And this land finally feels like home.

The Lord's Prayer.

Jesus said this is how we are to pray.

Lord, my heart is heavy and burdened for your creation: your people, your land, and your critters. Thank you that you dwell in goodness and faithfulness and love and mercy and grace. I rejoice in the power of your name.  Your plan is to restore all of creation; I pray for that now in this moment. Make earth new, just as it is where you are. Until then, give us what we need each day to serve you and serve your creation. Sorry we are hurting the works of your hand and making it into a place where suffering and brokenness play. I choose to love the perpetrators of this, including myself. Protect us from ourselves and other sources of pain and greed and corruption. This place is yours, we are yours. Make yourself known.

Amen.

At work in the small things.

It's been two months now that I've been serving the students of Mount Royal University. It has been a really amazing experience. God is teaching so much to me about his heart for people, and his heart for all people. It's been amazing to really learn to celebrate diversity. There's no other place to learn that than in a University. There have definitely been hard moments, moments where things are quiet, conversations feel uncomfortable, and I feel tired. In these moments I question why I'm here and whether this is really where God wants me. I question if it is necessary for me to be here, if students need someone like me. And then there are days like today when I saw a hunger and desire to have spaces for meaningful dialogue about faith, to have an individual to talk with about inner struggles and fears, to be cared for in a way not offered anywhere else in the institution. The reason I felt so excited to be here in the beginning was because of the faith crisis people enter into post high school. Students are smacked in the face with different ways of living contrary to the way they were raised and many have no safe place (even within their own faith communities) to question and wrestle. I always tell these students how God delights in their questioning. By questioning, I believe God recognizes your pursuit of Him, your eagerness to be true to him, to know him.

I'd like to share the last two days with you and how I have really felt God using me to be a safe place for people to question and wrestle, as well as be encouraged and commissioned.

Every Wednesday on campus we facilitate a Christian worship time. This was a beautiful time of worship and prayer and encouragement. We shared about our hope and how we live out our hope.

I met up with a young woman named Carrie who has a huge heart for broken people. She is very keen to serve in Africa with my husband and I this coming May. She has a Catholic/Native spirituality background, but doesn't seem to practice anything seriously now. I could see a passion in her for people that I am convinced can only be from her Maker himself. I left feeling incredibly grateful for people like her.

A few days ago I had a young lady flag me down, almost desperate to meet with me. We met up Wednesday and spent an hour and a half together, sharing our stories, sharing our challenges, and praying for one another. It was beautiful.

Thursday started with a student Interfaith Dialogue I help facilitate. We had a few students and faculty gather and share on the question "What do you see as your role in the world?" It was amazing to hear the different perspectives, but most seem to talk about bringing hope, restoring people, bringing change.

After the dialogue, there seemed to be a number of different students gathering in our office. It's an extremely small office so the 8 of us packed it pretty good. Out of the 8 people, there were 7 faiths represented. We immediately engaged in an amazing conversation about faith and different faiths and what it means to pursue faith intentionally. We were able to challenge one another on seeking God whole-heartedly, on questioning what is the world and what is God, on what life is really all about. After most cleared out, there were three of us left: Muhammad, Nasra, and myself. Muhammad and Nasra had never met each other prior, but both are from Pakistan and have an Islamic background. Muhammad left his faith and has been searching since. Nasra opened up about being really uncomfortable in her faith and wanting to explore also. She said she's been reading the Bible a little bit and has been connecting with it, but is really scared because of her family. She expressed, very emotionally, that she wanted to seek out Christianity because it feels true. Muhammad expressed how he knows exactly what she's going through and encouraged her to be courageous in her pursuit of God, that she needs to do this and be confident in it. Nasra was really keen to meet up with me next week to ask questions and share our journeys. I feel absolutely privileged to be the one to journey with students like this. Not that I'm trying to snatch them up to convert them, but that I really care for them and want to walk with them as they journey through their questions and doubts.

There is a scripture that has been energizing me lately:

"I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. For the creation waits in eager expectation for the children of God to be revealed. For the creation was subjected to frustration, not by its own choice, but by the will of the one who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay and brought into the freedom and glory of the children of God. We know that the whole creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth right up to the present time. Not only so, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for our adoption to sonship, the redemption of our bodies. For in this hope we were saved." Romans 8:18-24

All of creation, everything that lives and breathes, is waiting for this hope: to be liberated from its bondage to decay and brought into the freedom and glory of the children of God! Lord, may it be so!

Thank you so so much for your prayer and financial support and participation in my life in general! You are absolutely essential to this ministry. Please continue to pray for the students I mentioned, as well as energy and spiritual discernment. There are 13,000 students on campus and I'm trying to figure out ways to connect with them, so wisdom is also needed!

If you are looking to give and don't want to support monthly, an online donation via credit card can be made at http://www.canadahelps.org/CharityProfilePage.aspx?charityID=s54389

Kristal

i am a chaplain

There have been months passing me by. They have been spent basking in the sun, running around with medium to large children, playing in water and trees and on mountain tops. These days, I find myself spending more hours in a concrete box within a concrete jungle. But there is life in it.

I've recently taken up an opportunity to serve as a chaplain on campus at Mount Royal University. It really feels like many dreams coming together as one beautiful gift. I have the privilege of building relationships with students, having meaningful conversations of faith and life and how they mix together. The focus of my day are names, being present to students. Seeking out students. There is no curriculum to uphold, there is no expectation of numbers. I almost can't believe it's real.

I spend my days booking coffee dates, sitting in the office and having lunch with whoever drops in, praying with students and church leaders and faculty, planning how students can engage deeper with the Creator, providing opportunities for students to connect with community.


I have had the opportunity to meet a number of students already and share stories over tea. I met a fiery girl named Dara who walked in darkness for a while. All throughout these dark times, she was very aware of a Spiritual Being who loved and cared for her. Her story is amazing. Light versus darkness. Light won.

I hope the same for another fellow I met. He practices Wicca. Working in multi-faith, this is not something that would stir me as much as this fellow did. We asked if he came from a different faith background and he said Christian. He justified why he moved from Christianity to Wicca and it broke my heart the claims he made on Christianity that just weren't true. It saddened me that this is how Christianity is viewed. This is how Christians have manipulated and distorted Jesus. This is how I've manipulated and distorted Jesus. My prayer and hope is that I can represent the Gospel - God's good story - in its purity and fullness of truth.

I partner with University Campus Ministries to be able to do this. They contribute a portion of money for my well-being (well for mine and Will's since he's studying), but the remaining space in our budget is up for grabs. Please let me know if you'd like to contribute and partner with me. I'm hoping to raise a few more hundred each month.

Love love,
Kristal

KONY 2012

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y4MnpzG5Sqc

Let's do this people!

beauty in the desert

so a recent dialogue has brought me to understand further what it means to be in a desert. we know in the christian faith that growth comes from spending time in a desert, but i've been recently challenged in my view of that growth. we see a desert (or tough, barren times) as something to quickly scramble out of in order to continue on our ascent towards perfection. we view the desert as a vital way to grow in our human condition to reach this perfection. but we are already made perfect in Christ. which means that perfection already exists within that desert just as well as perfection exists out of the desert, on that mountain peak.

today as soon as i got off work, i drove to will's work to greet him with a coffee and a muffin. i then stayed with him until he was off, 2 hours later. during those two hours, we sat mostly in silence, but found deep richness in the state of being together. there was something extremely special about it. reflecting on it now, i am truly thankful for this because if it weren't for the job i'm working and the life i'm living, that moment would not have been possible. if it weren't for this desert, i wouldn't have discovered that beauty and perfection lies within it.

peace and joy in a puddle of uncertainty

outside, my life looks pretty standard. inside it feels pretty bizarre. i'm married to the most incredibly sweet and considerate and funny and stone-cold-foxy human being. i work in a coffee shop part-time. i live in a house. we have friends we see occasionally. we eat popcorn and watch movies often. we ski on weekends.

inside, i question a lot.

who... what... where... when... ummmm why?

answers please.

i have a ton of dreams. we could do this at this time in this place for this very great reason. orrrrr what about this? orrrrr ooh ooh this one would be soo great!

i battle with it a lot. there is incredible value (most times it is crucial) in waiting and listening and resting and being uncomfortable in this stand-still. but what about everything that's going on outside of this lovely millarville home? what about clearance and lorraine? what about the mother that abandoned her baby in the dumpster in lloydminster? what about the somalian women in britian who continue to take their young girls to somalia to be circumcised, feeding their own oppression? what about the kids in our schools waiting to discover that they can question? what about the kids who just need someone to see them? what about any of the people here (rich, poor, fat, thin, ... broken) suffering?

there's got to be something brewing for us.

until then, i guessssssss, i will try to be patient. until then, i will embrace the beautiful moments with my husband in this quiet time. i will embrace the peace and joy that somehow exists within this.

My friend the Artist

http://www.sknac.ca/index.php?page=ArtistOfTheMonth&id=5

Good News from Nigeria

I wrote earlier about two girls in Nigeria whose home was demolished by the government. Today my dear friend Jackie wrote this to me:

I met your little girls in Ilaje community. What is so cool is that they remembered you as the white girl with long hair after I told them that there is a friend of theirs that was really concerned about their whereabouts after their house was demolished... so I have a pic of them waving at you to say they are safe, God protected them..

the moments of my day

there are moments within every season or every situation of life. the moments are usually small but we were created for them. these moments exist everyday and although they are small, it is how we fulfill our purpose in life. although they are small, they require risk. we need to give up ourselves and surrender to the people and the God around us. that's the only way we can step into these moments because the world around us is telling us that these moments are small, insignificant, and not worthwhile. but it's in these moments that God truly works.

i will enter His gates

We started the day by sleeping in and then having breakfast ... pancakes, hashbrowns, fruit, eggs. We then proceeded to sit together and watch beautiful music. Then we decided to go on an outdoor adventure. We longboarded for a bit and then stashed our boards in the forest under leaves (Will did a great job of hiding.. I could barely find them when we returned). We walked up the hill and then just sat together for a long while. We talked and we sat in silence. For the most part it just felt like we were basking in God's goodness. It was beautiful. It was refreshing.

I am so so thankful for this life.

Some people just don't count.

In 2009 I had the opportunity to visit Nigeria, specifically a community called Ilaje in Lagos. I blogged about it here. Ilaje was fascinating because half of the people lived on the land and half lived on the water in these wooden shacks on stilts.

I recently discovered that the government demolished all the homes that were on the water, leaving many families homeless and hopeless. Some have secured shelters on land but many have left looking for shelter elsewhere.

The only thing I could find on it are these excerpts from an article I found online:

The Lagos State Government has ordered the demolition of over 400 shanty homes on Ilaje Lagoon in Bariga Local Council Development Area, LCDA, Lagos, Southwest Nigeria.
With this development over 1, 000 Ilaje people living on water in the area will be displaced.

Commissioner for Waterfront and Infrastructure Development, Prince Adesegun Oniru visited the area on Wednesday and was unhappy about what he saw, saying that government could no longer tolerate a situation where its waterfront is turned into a slum by the Ilajes and that they have to quit the place.
According to him, the area had been an eyesore, especially when viewed from the Third Mainland Bridge, stressing that this ugly spectacle could drive away foreign investors visiting Lagos for the first time.
He vowed that the government would demolish all the shanties at the next visit, adding that, “we have come here to warn you to leave this place; we would not come back here to warn you again.
“The bridge you see there is an international link bridge, and we do not like the eyesore these shanties are creating here, we do not want them near the bridge anymore. The entire area has been bastardised with shanties in the water and we would remove them if you refuse to move.”

On the possibility of relocating them, Oniru said that there were no plans to assist the dwellers relocate to other areas, saying, “Why will you relocate someone that is not supposed to be in this area in the first place? There are people here along the water front, they are not supposed to be here; they should move away from there and I don’t believe that a plan should be put in place to relocate them”.

It's easy to let it pass, but there are two girls stuck in my mind that I can't shake. They lived in a home on the water and attended one of our community schools.




They have a name. But now they don't have a home.

Help me pray for them and others like them.

Please pray for those in authority to have wisdom and that our displaced children can be resettled and that they can continue enjoying food security, basic health care and education provided for in the community based organisation in Ilaje community. Pray that our children will be able to come back and continue with their education.

wanda and friends like to hang out with me daily

Wanda and her friends are often hanging out in our yard. I am always thrilled when they come to play, but have been recently discouraged when I found out our neighbour feeds them ... sad. I guess our love grass isn't just it.

OH.... well i see you too!

long walks and long happy days (a photo update)

geo-caching.

african-y date nights

adventures (bon iver/portland)

change